


Frost and Time

by Dumbtard (sophiethung)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - How to Train Your Dragon Fusion, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Enemies to Lovers, Jealousy, Keith and Shiro are Siblings, M/M, Mainly Klance, Mutual Pining, shance is brief, theyre rlly evil too, theyre such petty shits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2017-07-18
Packaged: 2018-12-02 02:06:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11499495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophiethung/pseuds/Dumbtard
Summary: Lance still cannot fathom how Keith, an incompetent and reckless child, has become Shiro's second in command. He's brash, petulant and... breathtaking. Nevertheless, his skills are limited to combat, and he's in no way fit to lead the team.Keith hates the childish, arrogant bastard that is Lance McClain. He repeatedly compromises missions, doesn't contribute to the team in as a trivial manner as all the others and makes diplomatic ties impossible with his flirtatious behavior. His... godlike features don't distract from the fact that he's a liability.Keith and Lance have a deep-rooted hatred for eachother - in their own words. The fragile balance between them shatters on Lance's birthday, where Keith realizes more than he wishes to.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Lmao oops I accidentally posted it and then I had to delete it
> 
> I'm klance trash
> 
> Partially inspired by Youth by Daughter and Waves by Dean Lewis

 

"Dammit, Keith!" Lance growls into his comm. Keith's reckless actions have landed them in a sticky situation with an angry horde of aliens similar to Nyma,  a girl that had betrayed them some time ago. Keith had stormed into their base without any kind of plan or diplomacy, completely ignoring Lance and Shiro's warnings, and now they were being chased towards their dragons.

"It's not my fault!" Keith says childishly.  Lance can just feel Pidge and Shiro groan and decides to keep his mouth shut, dashing for Blue instead.  Of course he denies it; Keith takes as much responsibility for his actions as a puppy does for its shit on the carpet. 

Pidge and Hunk are up ahead,  but Lance is gaining fast. His legs are significantly longer. When Pidge stumbles and falls, he hauls her to her feet easily. Lance materializes his Bayard and returns fire to the mob chasing them. 

"Lance, no!" Shiro shouts. Of course. When Keith fucks up it's completely acceptable, but when he shows any signs of aggression he gets scolded. 

Lance leaps up when Blue comes dashing towards him. He lands on her massive leg and jumps on her back, immediatly spurring her into flight. She spreads her elegant wings and takes off into the white clouds. 

He growls when he sees Shiro gaining on him, keeping up the game they've been playing since day one. Shiro makes it to the dragon hangar first, snickering into his comm. Despite being older and far more mature than his half-brother, Keith, Shiro has moments of unadulterated amusement that leave Lance stunned. It's endearing, to say the least. 

Blue pulls in her wings and dives into the hangar bay, speeding past touched down Shiro and Reyna. Keith's Red comes in after him, followed by Pidge's Rex and finally Hunk's Halt. Halt's a black Thunderpede the size of Blue, but with far smaller wings and bigger body, slowing him down often. Lance hops down onto the cushioned floor and strokes Blue's dull-brown head. 

Even though the crown-like horns sitting horizontally on her head are longer than Lance's height, he still finds her the most adorable dragon of all of them. Blue lets him pet her for a moment before she bounds off to Red. 

Traitor. 

Red suits Keith, though. She's small and feisty with a nasty habit of lighting herself on fire. Her maroon scales laced with gold stripes are quite beautiful, though Lance would never admit it out loud. Keith would become insufferable. Red could probably only carry two people at most, Lance thinks. She's very fast and a great fighter, like Keith, but far friendlier.

"Keith!" Lance bellows when Keith jumps off Red. "Why the quiznak would you say something like that?" Keith had run into that alien fortress with his pretentious Bayard-sword swinging, demanding that they lower their weapons. Keith storms towards him, eyes fiery and blazing. Lance meets him halfway. Keith may be a better fighter, but Lance is stronger and taller, which comes in handy in a staredown like this one. 

"They were going to fire their cannons! They had them locked onto the dragons!" Keith's voice is defensive, and Lance takes this opportunity to prod. 

" _We_ train _our_ weapons on incoming vessels too, mullet!" Lance takes satisfaction in Keith's anger at the nickname. "It's called precaution." 

Keith opens his mouth to speak but Shiro cuts in. "Guys, could you please stop fighting for one second?" He turns to Keith. " That really wasn't your best decision. And Lance? You made things worse. Now we have no chance of even apologizing." He's referring to the firing back. Lance is about to protest but Shiro holds up his hand to silence him.

"Great flying today, guys!" says Hunk,  attempting to keep Lance and Keith from killing eachother,  presumably. "Keith, that dive was awesome!" Lance scoffs and moves to join Shiro.

He whistles and Blue comes racing towards him, nearly knocking him over with her underwings. He guides her next to Reyna, an abnormally large Skrill with jetblack scales. Reyna is a dark and brooding dragon, her mysterious features enhanced by dark purple veins and metallic spikes along her spine. Her eyes are intelligent yet not openly curious like Blue or Rex. She stands a couple feet taller than both Blue and Halt, but it's fitting as she's the leader of the dragons, as Shiro is among humans. 

Lance fumbles with the straps around Blue's belly, and catches the heavy saddle when it falls. With a grunt he places it on the rack behind Blue. She muzzles him one last time, looking for sweets, before running off to tackle Red again. 

Lance huffs and walks out of the hanger to the mess hall,  where Coran and Allura are waiting for them. He takes a deep breath before entering, preparing himself for Allura's wrath. Coran is in the kitchen, rummaging with the pots and Allura is pacing the room with a scowl on her face.

  
Over the months they've spent here, in the castle, Hunk has taught Coran more and more about Earth cuisine. He's able to make a decent meal now, though Lance still wouldn't call it good. He smells the rice before he even enters the hall, and it painfully reminds him of his family.

He checked Earth news several weeks ago, hoping and fearing for news from the Garrison, and finding that he'd been presumed dead. He figured it'd be better this way, that his family no longer looked for him or expected him to return, but the memories are like an irresistibly itchy scab that bleeds when it's pealed away.

Allura looks annoyed to say the least, when he walks in, but Lance winks anyway. It's amusing to find that almost the entire crew is fairly bothered by his endless flirting, teasing and sexual references. Lance doesn't ever really care for the people subjected to his attention, but if they're willing he appreciates the release. With only his hand to indulge him ever since he got on this ship, he welcomes any warm, humanoid body. Though it's only happened once with Nyma, who took him for herself under a tree before tying him down and betraying him, Lance doesn't relent. He restricts his tempting to females, however, not sure if being queer is acceptable in Altean customs.

"That was an utter failure," Allura says, deftly sitting at the head of the table. "You didn't even try to establish some kind of common ground." Lance sits two chairs away from her, takes his bowl of rice and heaps it with a yellow sauce he isn't sure he should eat.

"Yeah, tell that to Keith," murmurs Lance under his breath. Only Shiro hears him, throwing him a glance from across the table. Keith is quiet next to him, poking unhappily at his food. Serves him right, Lance thinks. His mother abhorred laying the blame on others more than anything. She'd once put him on chicken duty for an entire month, only letting him out of the house to tend to those devils, all for blaming his sister for a failed surfing trip. Disobeying her is unpleasant, but he's almost an adult now, and he's already broken so many rules. 

"Well, despite this failed mission," chirps Pidge, setting her empty bowl aside. She certainly ate faster than anyone Lance ever met. He supposes it's because she's still growing. "I've picked up a signal from a nearby tribe, requesting assistance with a search and rescue party." 

"Alright," says Shiro, nodding along with Coran and Hunk, "let's go check it out."

"Is there a Galra ship that could've picked up the transmission?" asks Lance, bored with the fact that he's the only one aware of their location's proximity to Galra territory. 

"Not that my scanners can sense, no." If Pidge's tech hasn't picked up on anything yet, there's a slim chance of alien ships being around. 

"Coran and Pidge," says Allura in a tired voice, probably still weary from their fifth failed attempt at establishing ties with potential allies, "you set a course towards the signal. The rest of you determine a plan of engagement." Lance is about to remark that they've no idea what kind of tribe this is, what they're supposed to be rescuing and what the potential dangers are, but stands up instead. Coran and Pidge leave to the bridge.

"Well," Hunk says. "Let's hope we won't have to fly too much. I don't think the dragons will really appreciate that." 

"Hunk, _Halt_ won't appreciate it, but I think Blue'll be fine," says Lance, stretching his arms and legs. 

"Why is she called Blue anyway?" says Keith, glaring at Lance. "She's grey." 

"With blue undertones, my detail-blind paladin," Lance says, wondering why Keith would ask this question after months of knowing Blue. "And several electric blue scales along her back." Lance has spent hours studying Blue, fascinated by the way she moves so exceptionally agilely, despite her size; by her mesmerizing eyes and her double wings that serve all kinds of purposes. Blue and Red are the only ones without sharp spikes or horns, relying on their spines along their backs and tails for maneuverability, which Lance is grateful for: it's more comfortable for him.   Pidge often jokes that he treats his dragon like his mistress, though Lance doesn't really disagree. 

"I'm not blind to detail, idiot," Keith says, color rising to his cheeks again. 

"You never were one for insults." Keith scowls and turns back to his rice.

Lance focuses on the mission again, contemplating shutting himself up in his chambers. This planet is too massive for Lance's liking. It takes two weeks to travel to the other side by highly advanced airship, which is still under repairs from a particularly aggressive attack. 

When Pidge says the tribe is nearby, she could mean this continent. Ever since Lance unwillingly joined Voltron, he realized how small and isolated Earth is from the rest of the world. They have no idea there are other humanoids out here. 

"Hey guys?" Pidge says over the comm. "We made contact with the Balmerians that sent the transmission-" Balmerians are cave-dwelling farmer creatures. "-and they say there's three possible locations of where the missing girl could be."

Lance keeps from sighing out loud, uncomfortable at the prospect of spilling up. He always worked better in a team, when he worked close enough to them. It was something he struggled with at the Garrison, because he hadn't known Pidge or Hunk very well. 

"What's the geography like?" asks Shiro.

"Ah, well... a desert, a skybase and a volcano."

"I call skybase," Lance says quickly. Blue isn't as resistant to heat as the others and Lance hates the desert. 

"I've got volcano," says Keith, seemingly uninterested. 

"Actually," says Pidge hesitantly. "I think Lance should go with Keith, because the volcano is surrounded by ocean." Lance groans. There is no way he's going anywhere with someone as insufferable as Keith. 

"Pidge, do you really think that's a good idea?" says Hunk, glancing from Keith to Lance.

"No, I think it would be good for them to work together," says Shiro, earning a glare from Lance. "Team bonding." He grins slyly, probably brewing some master plan to get them to stop fighting. It won't work. Keith's impulsiveness and brashness contradicts Lance's calculated, relaxed ways too much for them to cooperate. 

"How do you even lose anyone in a volcano, anyway?" asks Hunk after a drawn-out silence. 

"The Balmerans have some kind of tech borrowed from the Olkari that allows them to have a base within the lava. Only Red is able to even get close to the heat. There should be some kind of visible entrance." 

"What about us, though?" asks Keith stupidly. "Won't we boil in our armor?"

"We have extreme heat resistant suits," says Coran over the comm. "It'll be uncomfortable, but you'll be safe." Lance shifts uncomfortably in his feet at the prospect of having to rely on Keith. 

"They lose contact with the base from time to time," Pidge says, "because of the extreme temperatures. The missing Balmorian was on patrol, checking in at the bases when she went missing."

"Pidge and I will get the desert area," says Hunk, already nervously fidgeting with his shirt. Hunk gets anxious on missions like these, Lance knows, where he doesn't have an entire team backing him. He trusts Pidge the most, ironically. She's half his size, eccentric and clumsy. 

"Me and Coran will be on the skybase," says Shiro curtly. "Alright, Keith and Lance, you two go to Coran and see about those suits. The rest of us will try to get as much information as possible about this girl." And with a wave of his hand, Shiro dismisses the group.

Lance can hardly stop himself from making a snide comment to Keith as they walk to the bridge in silence. He just _knows_ Keith will fuck this mission up too. Lance does generally try to give people second chances and he's got a knack for seeing below the surface, but Keith just has the uncanny ability to draw out the worst in him. 

"Ah!" says Coran when the reach the bridge. "Our exceedingly aggressive paladins!" Keith looks as affronted as Lance feels.

"I am not aggressive, Coran," Lance says indignantly. He cocks his head to Keith. "Him and Shiro are."

"Though you're not much of a close range fighter," says Coran, grinning broadly, "you are one of two deadliest paladins." Coran lives joking around like this, drawing imaginary connections between Keith and Lance for fun. "Shiro is more... peaceful."

Lance feels inclined to call bullshit, as Shiro kills with his bare hand, but then he remembers he's only ever seen him lose his cool once. He knows his own strategies are a little bit more brute and lethal, but at least he has strategies - Keith just runs blindly into danger like a great buffoon.

"Right," Coran says, shaking his head, "the suits are quite similar to your current armor, but they're heavier and harder to move around in." He taps the screen and a hologram pops up. The suits essentially looks the same, but instead of only the torso, legs and part of the arms being covered, the entire body is decked out in heavy plates. "You'll have about seven hours of oxygen in them, so I suggest you change when you get there."

Lance nods. "And will we be able to communicate to the bridge in these?" 

"Yes, but I don't know how things turn out once you're inside the base."

Lance feels slightly reassured about the mission knowing he'll be able to talk to Allura. 

"Five minutes to destination," says Allura from the helm. 

Lance turns and walks briskly to the armory, which is just three doors down the corridor. It's a large hall with neatly arranged specialty weapons from Althea's   prime time. He doesn't know what half of these things do, but he suspects they're all far more sophisticated than Earth weapons.

There are five volcano suits in their tubes along one of the walls, each with their respective color across the chest plate. Not surprisingly they're all the correct sizes, from Pidge's small, wiry frame to Shiro's muscular build. 

Lance smiles when he sees his own suit as adjusted to the changes his body has gone through since he got here. He's gotten taller and broader, presumably in part because of his training and due to late growth spurts. If only the girls who'd called him too skinny at the Garrison could see him now, he thinks. 

The suit is heavier than he expected, and he grunts when he takes it from the tube. He hauls it to the chute connecting to the dragon hangar, pushing it down and closing the hatch. He starts when he hears Keith shout behind him. Lance turns on his heels and sees Keith clutching the suit, swaying unsteadily on his feet. Lance sighs in exasperation and walks toward Keith, easily taking the smaller suit from his arms and carrying it to the chute. 

"Thanks," mutters Keith begrudgingly, red in the face and crossing his arms. Lance grins, enjoying Keith's embarrassment.

"What's that?" he says innocently. Keith glares at him and flips him off. Lance laughs before following him to the elevator. Keith pushes the button to the dragon hangar and turns his back to Lance like the child he is. Not for the first time he wonders how Shiro has such strange faith in Keith.   

Once they've saddled their dragons and strapped on the suits, Hunk joins them to debrief them on the girl.

"Okay," he says. "So her name's Shay, and she's a relatively inexperienced guard, according to her family. They didn't really dive a very good physical description, only that's she's from the mining clan. So... yeah."

"Great," huffs Keith grumpily.

"Ah, come on," teases Lance, prodding Keith with his elbow. "What's more fun than going into one of the most destructive forces of nature to rescue a girl we don't know how to find?"

Keith blankly stares at him in the eyes before answering with a completely straight face: "You falling into the fire."

"Hey! I heard that!" says Shiro over the comm.

"Okay guys," says Allura from the bridge, "we've reached the midpoint of all three locations. Keith, the volcano is a few kilometers away from an island cluster directly north. Pidge-"

"Yeah, I've got the coordinates."

"Okay. Shiro, the airbase is roughly six kilometers south-east of here. Stay above the cloud and you won't miss it."

"Alright," Shiro replies. "Open the doors."

With a loud hiss the bay doors in the roof  slide open, and Lance clambers onto Blue. He feels that familiar yet exhilarating sensation when she surges up, tucking in her wings momentarily to fit through. And then they're free, climbing higher and higher, wings beating gracefully before plummeting towards the still ocean. Lance braces himself for the moment Blue unfurls her wings, whooping when she does. Her claws skim the surface and send water spraying up behind them, forming a flickering rainbow. 

Lance hears Keith laugh, a pure and clear sound - nothing has ever sounded worse. Still, it doesn't ruin the absolute joy that fills Lance's lungs. Blue glides with such ease, and Lance can't help but throw his arms out. His helmet obstructs the true freedom a little, but they're not here to have fun. That part is just a side effect.

"What did Allura say about clouds again?" says Keith, coming up beside Lance and gazing as the endlessly clear sky. 

"Just you wait," snickers Lance, amused by Keith's cluelessness about he sea. Keith doesn't seem to notice, instead enjoying the warm weather and the views. 

Lance can already see the islands in the ddistance - large rocks jutting from the seas in harsh formations. None of the islands look much bigger than the Castle, seaboards hollowed out by water. Lance sees caves but enough to fit Blue hidden in the rocks as they fly past.

It's tough maneuvering through the islands, especially with extra cargo strapped behind Lance, so he chooses to glide above it all, followed by Red, who's more easily thrown off balance. 

"Over there!" says Lance, pointing to a distant blob on the horizon. 

"I'll race you!" Keith shouts back. Lance grins and spurs on Blue, easily keeping up with an accelerating Keith. He lies low over her neck, moving with the beating of her leathery wings and presses into the soft chink in her armor. The spines on her back split in two and she surges forwards past Keith. 

Blue's wings are bigger in proportion, though Red is more built for speed. Red's small size is hindering her now, with the cargo on her back. Blue leaves her behind easily, and Lance laughs. 

He focuses on the rapidly approaching volcano, a grey, lonely mountain surrounded by green waters. Jagged rocks that look like teeth jut out around a giant steel door. 

Blue lands smoothly, sending pebbles flying as she skids to a halt. Keith is sulking when he arrives several seconds later, probably bitter about losing.

"That wasn't a fair fight," he grumbles. Lance scoffs.

"It was your idea," he says, glancing nervously at the sky. He shakes his head and unstraps the suit, letting it fall to the ground beside him. There are a lot of hooks and buttons to figure out, but eventually he manages to be fully dressed. He waits impatiently for Keith to finish, and looks around for a hideout for Blue.

There's a few boulders that provide enough shelter, and Lance leads Blue amongst them. "Hey girl," he says quietly. "Just stay in here when the storm hits, okay?"

"What are you on about?" says Keith. "It's so calm out." Lance stares at him and shakes his head. Fucking imbecile.

"How are we going to get in?" he says, looking at the heavy door. He's barely finished his sentence before they heave open with a groan, and heat hits Lance like a punch. 

"Like that," says Keith before clambering up into the volcano. Lance follows and gapes around when he makes it inside. 

The heat is almost unbearable, and Lance feels sweat trickle down his neck. The inside of the mountain is hollowed out, with lava bubbling in the chasm. The walls seem to glow red. There's a shuttle parked on a stone platform several paces away from them, and Keith and Lance share a look before approaching it. 

The access pad beside the doors of the shuttle lights up when Leith touches it, displaying a message.

Welcome, paladins of Voltron. Please, only the fire paladin can continue from here. 

Lance looks at Keith uncertainly, who shrugs and pressed the pad again, causing the doors to hiss open. As soon he steps into the shuttle, however, both the shuttle and the volcano gates close, locking Lance in.

"Keith?" he asks panickedly. 

"Yeah?" Keith sounds about as calm as he feels. The shuttle starts to move towards the lava, and Lance bangs on the door. "Lance, I'm not doing anything!"

"Just get back as soon as you can!" shouts Lance, terror seizing his heart. When the shuttle is too far away for him to reach, he scutttles towards the wall, keeping as far from the lava as he can. Red roars at the lava, probably seeing if Keith will come back.

"Allura?" he says into the comm. There's just static relaying back to him. So much for operating communications.

He sinks down to his heels, shivering not from cold, but from fear. His breath comes in labored rasps in the heat, and he rests his head against the sharp rocks. 

* * *

 

 He wakes with a stiff neck and cramped up limbs, slumped against the wall in the hot hall. Red is curled around him, protecting him from most of the heat.  Lance checks his oxygen tank and sees he has about five hours left, meaning he's been sleeping for two. When he looks up he sees what woke him: the shuttle is emerging from the lava. 

He groans when he stands, leaning on Red for support. She cooes softly, nuzzling his hand with her nose. She's definitely nicer than Keith. When Keith steps from the shuttle after it landed, she jumps up and nearly tackles him.

"Did you find her?" asks Lance. Keith shakes his head. "Well then why were you down there for so long?"

"They wanted my help with some repairs, I think. Mostly they just interrogated me about Voltron."

"What?"

"I didn't tell them anything important. They mostly just asked what it was like working with an idiot like you." Lance rolls his eyes, and Keith laughs. "Come on, let's go." 

Keith walks towards the heavy doors of the volcano, which slowly shift open, revealing a raging storm. Wind hurls into the cave, and rain drenches the suits immediately. Lance runs out and finds Blue in her little shelter. 

He quickly strips off the heavy suit and jumps onto her back, leaving behind the cargo in the pebbles. Lightning flashes behind him over the ocean, and Lance can't see much further than a couple of meters. He grits his teeth as he's almost thrown off Blue by the wind. 

Keith struggles to lead Red into the open,  as she's too light to get a grip on the stones. 

"Keith!" Lance shouts over the howling wind. "You've got to let her stay! We can go to the caves on the island!"

"I can't just leave her here!" Keith shouts back. 

"Red can survive for longer than five hours in the volcano! You can't!"

Lance can hear Keith growl in frustration before he lets Red fly back into the cave. He yanks off the suit and runs towards Blue. Lance spurs Blue forward and reaches down with his hand, pulling Keith up when he grabs his wrist. Even before Keith is fully seated behin Lance, Blue pushes off and flies into the storm. She unfurls her secondary wings from her primary ones for more balance, but even so she's thrown around by the wings. Somehow she manages to stay upright and flying forward, going as fast as she can towards the islands. 

Keith shouts behind him as they're hit with a particularly strong gust of wind, and he wraps his arms around Lance's waist to keep from falling. 

The islands appear suddenly from the rain, and Blue swerves to avoid hitting the rocks. Lance bends low as she twists and turns around the smaller islands in search for a large cave. They finally find one, high above the raging sea and deep enough to keep out the wind a little. Blue crashes into it, and Lance grunts as she hits the ground. 

Keith and Lance slip off Blue's back and walk towards the back of the cave, where  the only evidence of the wind is the howling and whistling on the edge of the cave. Lance shivers in his under armor, which is completely drenched. He leads Blue to the wall, where she curls up into a semicircle, leaving space for them to huddle against her warm stomach.

They have no wood for a fire, no protection from the cold. Lance can hear Keith's teeth clattering, can see him shivering. 

"Keith, come here," he says, lifting Blue's wing for Keith to crawl under. He looks like he's going to protest for a second, but then he shuts his mouth and curls up against Blue's belly. Lance follows him, letting Blue close her wing over them. The little space they have is cramped, and Lance is pressed up against Keith. It's warm though, and Keith stops shivering after several minutes. Lance knows the storm won't pass soon, so he closes his eyes, waiting for the sky to clear or the comm to start working again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh... Guys it's slow burn even in the pining sense. They don't know they're pining yet. 
> 
> Also, I am aware that Lance is supposed to be sixteen, but for the sake of this fic he's a little older.

"Hello?" Pidge's voice is static and broken, snapping Keith out of his dream. It takes him a second to realize where he is, and then another one to realize he's  _on top_ of Lance. He gags silently and pushes himself away from Lance without waking him, bumping against Blue on accident. She wakes and bumps him with her blunt nose. He picks up his helmet and puts it on, not sure when he'd taken it off in the first place.

Keith always hated the fact that she's so similar to Red, with the same facial structure and anatomy, differentiation only in their wingspan and skill set. Blue is much bigger, with secondary wings that are able to separate from the primary wings and serve as arms and stabalizers. Blue is also far better as shooting powerful fireball from a distance with deadly accuracy, while Red is lethal when she's close. 

He walks to the entrance of the cave before responding to Pidge. "Yeah?" His voice is low with sleep and he yawns.

"Oh thank god," he hears Hunk say. "You're okay?"

"Yeah. Sorry, we got caught in a storm. We had to stay on one of the islands. Did you find the girl?"

"Yeah, she's safe," says Hunk. He sounds flustered.

"Pffft," says Pidge. "Safe and subjected to Hunk's affection." Keith laughs.

"Screw you, Pidge." 

"Keith?" That's Shiro, who presumably just walked onto the bridge. "Where are you guys?" 

"In one of the caves," replies Keith, yawning again. He rubs a hand over his neck, groaning when he feels how sore he is. "We had to leave Red behind in the volcano, so we're gonna go there as soon as I wake up Lance." Keith looks back at Lance, who's still passed out beside Blue. He feels blood rush into his cheeks and chides himself for falling asleep on top of Lance. 

"Red's still there?" Shiro sounds worried, probably thinking they were in some kind of serious trouble, or that Red was captured. 

"Yeah, she couldn't get through the storm, and we couldn't stay." Keith walks back and prods Lance's side with his foot.  Lance jerks awake and glares at Keith, who rolls his eyes and turns away. 

"Alright, we'll pick you up there," says Allura. Keith thanks her and focuses on Lance again, who is sitting up and stretching. 

"Get up," he mumbles. "We gotta get Red, and they're picking us up at the volcano." Lance nods sheepishly and pats at his hair, which is sticking up in every direction. It's gotten longer over the months, now falling in a wavy fringe of sorts over his forehead. Lance usually combs it either up or back, but now it's hanging down and Keith catches himself staring. 

"Come on, Blue," says Lance, voice raspy and eyes lidded. He isn't a morning person, Keith knows, but he's never seen him this disheveled. "Gotta get your buddy." Lance yawns and rubs his eyes, before grabbing his helmet and yanking it on. 

Lance leads Blue to the entrance of the cave, where he clambers on to Blue. He offers a hand to Keith but he swats it away, perfectly capable of getting onto a damn dragon by himself. Lance rolls his eyes at Keith, but Keith really couldn't care less. The saddle is small, so he's pressed up against Lance. There's also nowhere to hold onto, so Keith settles for potentially falling off. Yesterday he had grabbed on to Lance, because he hadn't been willing to drown. 

Keith holds in a yelp when Blue suddenly lifts off, not used to her rhythm. She feels different from Red, moving in a slightly more drastic yet flowing manner. They soar over the islands, the seas slapping against the shores and wind tugging at their clothed skin. The sea isn't as calm as it was before the storm yesterday, but somehow that doesn't bother Keith very much. Rain drizzles down softly, speckling Keith's vizor with water. It's cold, and Keith finds himself hiding from the wind behind Lance's back. If Lance notices, he doesn't say anything. 

Blue lands smoother than Red probably ever could and Keith makes sure he kicks Lance when he swings his legs over. Lance scowls and flips him off before turning to the already opening doors. 

Red launches onto him and knocks him on his ass as soon as she spots him, earning laughter from Lance. She crushes him by laying her head on his chest, and Blue has to push her off for Keith to be able to breathe again. Keith looks up when he hears a distant hum, spotting the Castle slowly approaching them. He walks to the drenched heat-suits and hauls the red on onto his saddle, sitting behind it and spurring her on to the Castle. 

He realizes he didn't think this through when Red dives into the hangar, and he has to throw himself over the equipment to keep it from falling, nearly sending himself toppling off Red. He grunts when she lands, and lets the suit glide down her side. Red purrs when he strokes her behind her ear, and he moves on to take the saddle from her.

As soon as she's free, she runs to Lance and Blue, who are still busy with unsaddling and getting the equipment off. Keith doesn't understand why Red is so attached to Blue, always sticking with her whenever she can. They're inseparable, which is at the very least inconvenient for Keith, who wants her to be happy while also staying as far from Lance as possible. 

Keith huffs and walks through the empty halls to the mess hall, where he presumes the others are waiting. He doesn't expect the mess hall to be a literal mess, with dirty bowls littering the table, egg cartons filling the trash can, and batter of whatever smeared everywhere. Hunk is in the middle of it all, shouting and directing the rest of the team. 

"Keith!" he bellows when he spots Keith. "Shut the door and don't let Lance in!" Keith does as he's told, wiping goo off the access pad with his sleeve. 

"What's going on?" he asks to no one in particular. Shiro is furiously mixing something in a bowl while Pidge adds the ingredients with a focused expression on her face that she usually preserves for her experiments, Coran is taking what look like cakes from the oven and putting in new ones, while Allura is chopping up fruits and vegetables. 

"We're planning a surprise party for Lance," says Hunk. Keith turns off his comm so Lance can't hear what they're saying, and sits in his chair. 

"He'll suspect something if we all stay here," says Keith, grinning at Shiro, who is sending splatters of beige batter everywhere. 

"You're right!" exclaims Allura, jumping to her feet. "I should go and distract him!" Without another word she storms off, leaving Keith scowling in his seat. Of course she would volunteer for that kind of job. Lance would forget everything if Allura _really_ put in effort to distract him. Fucking classic.

"Keith!" Hunk shouts. "Chop the fruits! I want slices, not cubes!" Keith laughs as he's reminded of a tv show he used to watch with Shiro. He looks at the strange fruits Allura has already cut, and copies them, blue juice leaking over his fingers. 

"Why are we planning a party!" he asks after a long while, realizing he doesn't know what the occasion is. 

"It's his birthday, Keith," says Pidge with exasperation. Keith raises his eyebrow in surprise, as that would make Lance almost a whole year older than him. They were in the same year at the Garrison, but Keith was one of the youngest, being born in May. Pidge obviously is an exception, making history with being the youngest cadet ever in Garrison history. 

"Wait, why did he not say anything?" Keith asks. It doesn't seem like Lance to keep something like this quiet, as he's usually loud and obnoxious about everything. 

Pidge shrugs. "He was like that at the academy, too. I think it's because he has too many siblings to ever have had a birthday party." Keith doubts that's the entire reason, but he drops it, focusing on his fruit. 

Hunk reveals they're making a three-layer cake fruits on top. He's also trying to make a sponge cake of sorts, saying something about making this feel like home. 

They manage to keep Lance distracted until evening, when they've decorated the mess hall and prepared all the food, by switching around in shifts to keep him busy. Keith is the only one who doesn't have to do it, which is absolutely fine by him. Lance wouldn't want to talk to Keith for a whole hour. 

When the clock hits the sixth afternoon hour, everyone is gathered in the hall, waiting anxiously and ready to jump to scare Lance. There are ribbons and banners hanging from the ceiling in colorful whirls, and balloons are scattered over the floor. They've opened the door to the common area, which is also decked in colorful decorations. When they hear Lance's footsteps outside, silence fills the room where excited whispering had been. 

The door hisses open and Keith jumps up from behind the table along with the others yelling "surprise!". Lance yelps in shock and stares at the sight in front of him. The cake is lathered in white frosting, blue fruits sticking out on top. Across the top layer in bright purple letters is "Happy Birthday!", drooping slightly. 

To Keith's surprise, he can see tears in Lance's eyes. Pidge notices them too, and she tackles Lance in a massive bear hug, joined swiftly by Hunk. Lance giggles when Shiro wraps his massive arms around all of them, and Coran and Allura come in to the hug. 

"Keith," growls Pidge from under everyone, voice muffled, "don't be such a little shit." 

"Language!" says Shiro. Keith laughs and joins them, only muttering one curse at Lance, who is laughing and hiccuping at the same time. 

"I knew I was getting too much attention," he sniffles. Keith looks up from between Allura and Coran and stares at Lance, not sure why he suddenly feels so... empathetic. "No way!" Lance suddenly exclaims, pushing past the mass of bodies that surround him and rushing towards the table. He marvels at the sponge cake, before crushing Hunk in an embrace. "How the hell did you make that?" Keith assumes the dish is something from Cuba, as nothing else could get Lance this excited. 

Hunk shrugs modestly. "Ah, I just looked up the recipe." 

"And, since you're officially eighteen now," Shiro pipes in, grinning at Lance. "I had Coran get this from the finest shop on this planet." He holds up a green bottle with a label Keith can't read. "Pidge, Keith and Hunk are having none of this, by the way," he adds sternly, confirming Keith's suspicion that it's alcohol. 

Lance laughs and walks to the common area, plopping down on the couch. Hunk slices the cake and hands everyone a plate and a cup of juice. Lance, Allura, Coran and Shiro all pour a little of the bottle's contents into their own cup, toasting to each other. Keith laughs when he sees their faces after drinking, all varying degrees of disgust. Coran is the only one who manages to keep a straight face, while Allura and Shiro are practically coughing. 

"Yeesh," says Lance. "That's strong." Of course Lance has experience with alcohol. The Garrison cadets were known for extravagant parties, and Lance was known for being the life of the party. Even Keith knows this, as he was once at a party, and he remembers Lance dancing with almost every girl present. Shiro lifts an eyebrow at him, being a complete hypocrite, as he went to quite a few events himself. Keith smirks as he bites into his cake, flavor exploding in his mouth.

"Oh my god," he mumbles. "Hunk, this is awesome!" Hunk smiles shyly, prodding at his own cake. Pidge screeches when she takes a bite, jumping around excitedly. But the best reaction in from Allura, who probably has never tasted anything sweet before. Her eyes go wide and she sags into her chair, feigning frailty and casting her eyes to the sky. Keith laughs along with the others, and Lance jumps up to plug his phone into the stereo system. 

The rest of the night is a mixture of Latin songs and Western pop, along with games with truth or dare and "let's see who can beat Shiro in a pillow fight", a game only won by Allura. For the first time in years, Keith feels like he's allowed to enjoy being young. Being a paladin has put so much pressure on all of them that they can't afford to be kids, which they all really are. 

"Guys," says Hunk with a yawn, stirring a sleeping Pidge in his lap. "I'm gonna hit the Hunk Bunk." Pidge hangs on to his shirt when he gets up to leave, sleepily rubbing her eyes and letting him guide her. Lance yawns too and stands up to stretch, his shirt riding up to reveal a sliver of skin. 

"Yeah, I'm going too," he says, cheeks red and eyes lidded. "Thank you so much for this, I loved it." It's strange that he's so thankful for this when he's never mentioned his birthday, or for him to sound so sincere and sober, though he's obviously tipsy. Shiro stands too and leaves after Lance without a word, leaving Keith alone with a drunk Allura and a sleeping Coran. 

"Shhhhhhhhh," slurs Allura, dramatically pressing her finger to her lips. "Don't wake hiiiimmm!" 

"Allura, I think it's time you go to bed," says Keith meekly, unsure how to deal with this kind of situation. He feels awkward when he helps Allura to her feet and she slumps against him. She's taller than him but he supports her easily. He almost carries her to her chambers, which are two corridors away from the mess hall. Allura stumbles and nearly falls twice, causing Keith to grunt. 

Once they're in the lavish room, Allura collapses on the softer-than-silk sheets, tangling up in her robes and her colorful pillows. Keith doesn't know why she would have so many. He hesitates before helping her undress, leaving her in her underwear. She giggles and plays with his hair as he grabs the shorts on her bedside table and slides them over her legs. 

"Hands up," he mumbles, tugging down the top over her torso. She lies down when he's finished, letting him tuck her into bed. "Drink your water," he says, gesturing to the glass on the nightstand. "Allura, do it or you'll have a headache tomorrow." 

She frowns but obeys him, chugging down the water sloppily. 

"You're so cute," she slurs, tugging at his hair again. "Shiro is so lucky to have you as a brother."

"Okay, Allura. Go to sleep."

He leaves her then, turning off the light as he departs the room. Once outside he lets out a breath, shaking off the awkwardness that stiffened his limbs. He turns and walks into one of the smaller hallways, roaming the Castle. 

They'd found several narrow halls after Sendak had infiltrated this place and the Galra crystal had corrupted Alfor's A.I. Lance and Keith had run from a ghost and found these passages on accident. Now they were Keith's favorite place in the whole Castle, because nobody ever came here, and they led straight to his quarters. 

He lets his mind wander to his home, a little house right by the Garrison. He wishes, not for the first time, that he'd known his father or his mother. She was or is Galra, which he still hates. He knows Allura hates it too, and no doubt the others still have their doubts. They all say they don't care, but Keith doesn't believe them. Hunk is the only one who put on a believable show when he found out, joking around with him. He wonders if things would've been different if his mother had been human. Would he have known her? 

Keith huffs at himself for still being hung up on this. His father had left him and had died, leaving him all alone. It wasn't until he met Shiro five years before the academy that he even knew he had other family. He's still grateful from Shiro, who'd taken care of him as much as he could. Shiro was away most of the time, training for his mission to Kerberos, but all the time he got off, he spent with Keith. 

Keith stills when he turns the corner, gaping at the scene in front of him. Lance is pressed into a dark gcorner, and Shiro's lips are on his neck. Shiro has his thigh pressed between Lance's legs, and his hand roams under his shirt. Lance's head is thrown back, and his eyes are closed. 

Keith clears his throat loudly, suddenly seething. Shiro and Lance pull apart, both looking flushed but neither stepping away from the other. "Shiro, can I talk to you?" Keith hisses through his teeth. He doesn't know why he's suddenly so angry, but rage courses through his veins and shakes his voice. He knows Shiro is the most bisexual person on this world, but he'd never figured Lance was too.

Shiro reluctantly follows Keith back around the corner, swaying slightly. Once they're out of earshot Keith rounds on Shiro. "What the fuck, Shiro?!" he says. Shiro just blinks sheepily, probably a little drunk as well. "You're my brother." Keith tries to keep his voice calm.

"Yeah, I know."

"Then why the quiznak would you go around nearly fucking the one guy I hate most?!" 

"You don't hate Lance," says Shiro stupidly, frowning. 

"Yes, I really do." Keith figures that's why he feels so angry about this whole thing, because he feels betrayed by Shiro for doing _this_ with _Lance_. "What are you thinking?! That just because he's legal now you can take your chance with him?"

Keith doesn't wait for an answer, storming past a stunned Shiro down the hall. When he turns the corner Lance is still there, his hair ruffled up and a stupid drunk look on his face. His lips are puffy and his shirt is still half-up, held that way by some unknown force. Keith exhales sharply and walks briskly towards his room. 

He slams the access pad and stomps inside, not bothering to change before crawling into his bed. He hides his face under his pillow from no one in particular, puffing out little breaths at a time. Fucking Lance and his shit face. 

Keith falls asleep thinking about Lance and his head thrown back as Shiro attacks his neck. 

His dreams aren't very different, but here he punches Shiro as rage floods him again. Lance whimpers and sinks to the floor, hugging his knees to his chest. Shiro had forced himself Lance. 

Keith holds out a hand for Lance to take, which he does. He leads Lance to his chambers, gently pulling him along. He sets Lance down on his bed, sitting beside him and gently stroking his arm. Lance leans in, eyes hooded and lips slightly apart. His face isn't as pretty as Keith remembers it, but his heart stammers all the same. When Lance's lips skim over his, Keith wakes in cold sweat, clutching his pillow to his chest and sporting a formidable boner. 

Realization hits him like a truck, and Keith bites into the pillow to keep from screaming. 

Oh, he's so fucked. 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh fuck I'm rlly bad at writing emotions cause I don't have any. And I kinda suck at writing ok bai

Lance sighs into his pillow, contemplating whether or not he really needs a head to live. It's not as if it's really served him a purpose so far, judging from all the stupid mistakes he's made. Lance's head is throbbing, painful pulses flaring up in his temples. Shiro is still asleep behind him, one strong arm wrapped around Lance and one snaked under his pillow. 

Lance regrets last night. He made a terrible decision, numbed by terrible alcohol. He predicts his future interactions with Shiro are going to be be extremely awkward, but he doesn't want to draw a difinitive line yet. Whether or not Shiro is casual after sex he doesn't know, seeing as he's never seen Shiro with anyone. He does admire many things about Shiro, from his carved muscles and strong body to his caring personality, but he never wanted this. Shiro has always been a rolemodel for him, and he'd harbored a crush for the senior officer since he first joined the Garrison. He'd never really meant for things to go this far. 

And Keith had seen them, too. That's probably the biggest regret of them all. He can ask Shiro to never mention having his dick up Lance's ass, but he can't ask Keith to forget what he saw. Lance isn't sure why it's bothering him so deeply - he's flirted with plenty of girls in front of Keith, never really being discreet. Lance sits up, forgetting for a second about Shiro and buries his face in his palms. He breathes in deeply, stilling when Shiro stirs and groans. 

"Oh, shit," Shiro breathes behind him. "Lance?" Lance turns to look and sees Shiro looking at him worriedly. Lance smiles weakly and lies down, facing Shiro. 

"Shiro," Lance begins, though he's not sure what he wants to say. "Listen, I-"

"It's okay, Lance," Shiro says gently, brushing a curl from Lance's eyes. "I understand."

"Thank you." Shiro smiles and rolls out of bed, grabbing his boxers from the floor and tugging them on with his back to Lance. He scoops up the rest of the clothes and dresses in silence, waving goodbye when he leaves. Lance stays under the sheets, which smell like sex and Shiro, for several minutes, thinking about his next move. He decides he needs to figure out the nagging feeling in his stomach that's slowly eating and tearing away his resolve to do anything. 

Once he's dressed, he finds himself moving to Pidge's room, which is unlocked. He knocks, and waits. A disgruntled Pidge opens the door, her hair tousled and glasses askew. She steps aside with a sigh, though she throws a knowing look at his chest. At the Garrison he often confided in her, from a painful rejection or stress-induced anxiety attacks. 

"Spill it," she says curtly, crossing her arms. 

"I fucked up and I'm not sure why it's so bad," he admits. Pidge raises an eyebrow. "I mean... it's not a big deal, but it feels like shit stuffed down my throat." 

"Lance, what the fuck did you do?" Pidge says, tapping her foot impatiently. 

"I slept with Shiro." Pidge stares at him, eyes wide in stunned silence. 

"What?!" she finally exclaims, closing the distance between them and forcing Lance to sit on the bed. 

"I was drunk, Pidge, and so was he," says Lance defensively. "Anyway, that's not even the terrible part."

"What part is worse than sleeping with Shiro?!"

"Keith saw us when we were making out in the hallway." Pidge hits him on the arm, twice. Then she rakes her fingers through her hair, puffing out her cheeks in an exhale. 

"Damn," she says quietly. Lance whimpers and buries his face in his hands again, falling back onto the bed. "What did he say?"

"He looked pissed as hell," says Lance without taking his hands from his face. "And he asked to talk to Shiro. I could hear him shouting, but I can't remember what he said." 

"You're such an idiot," Pidge says quietly, as if she can't believe him. Then she flops onto his stomach, resting her head on his chest. Lance grunts and drops his hands to look at her. Her cheek is squished against his torso, making her seem impossibly young. "Do you not even realize what this means?" Lance's cheeks are blazing because he's fully aware what it means, as talking to Pidge usually makes him realize things. He just refuses to admit it, not wanting to spill the terrible truth from his lips. He's always hated him, competing with him at the Garrison and being bested at everything. Lance had a certain level of respect for his fighting skills, but it was overshadowed by the jealousy and spite he felt for him. "Impending doom by sex with Shiro." 

"Fucking Christ," Lance says, laughing despite the feeling he's going to vomit. "Could you not make this harder than it is?" 

"No," Pidge says plainly. "But seriously, when do you think first realized it?" Lance looks at her questioningly. He's pretty sure this is the first time he's even noticed it. "Oh come on, all of yesterday the two of you were more tense than usual." 

"Oh, I guess when we got hauled into that storm. He was with me on Blue," Lance says, running his fingers through his hair. "He looked so cold, I sorta felt bad so I invited him to sleep next to me and Blue." Pidge nods, contemplating his theory. "I woke up in the middle of night and he was on top of me, completely. I didn't want to wake him so I just fell back asleep." 

"And that didn't make you have a full-blown gay moment of truth?" asks Pidge incredulously. Lance laughs nervously. Now that he thinks of it, that could've been valid cause to question his hate towards Keith, but everything had happened relatively quickly. 

"Anyway," he says, "now Keith is probably super angry at me for sleeping with his brother -" Pidge snickers. "-and I don't know what to do." 

"Let Shiro talk to him first," says Pidge immediately. "He's probably already there now, knowing Shiro. Talk to him after tomorrow, I guess."

"Two whole days?"

"Trust me, Lance, Keith is the type that needs eons to calm down. He's a more impulsive killer than you." Lance genuinely laughs now, nerves and giddiness getting the better of him.

Pidge snorts and giggles too, drilling her elbow into his stomach. "I can't believe you slept with Shiro," she laughs. "He's like, seven years older than you!" She gasps. "What did he say when he woke up?"

"He said it was fine and that he understood," says Lance. "I think I kind of implied that I was freaking out."

"Were you?"

"Yeah." Giggles erupt from the two of them, causing Lance's headache to flare up again.  Pidge notices and raises an eyebrow at him. "I was pretty drunk, Pidge." She snickers and pushes off his stomach, and Lance grunts when she prods a finger into his belly. She walks to her bathroom and comes back with a glass of water and a pill. 

Now it's Lance's turn to raise an eyebrow, and Pidge snorts. "My head hurts after anxiety attacks." That made sense. Even at the Garrison, Pidge would panic often. It was different from Hunk's panic, which was fear of flying. Pidge gets frustrated when she messes up an experiment or an invention, and that frustration frequently leads to anxiety attacks. Lance wonders whether this all started when Matt and Sam went missing, or if this was something she struggled with before. He suspects its both. 

He takes the glass and gulps the water down with the pill, before setting it down on the nightstand. "I really hate hangovers," says Lance, holding his head in his lap. Pidge scoffs and plops her head in his lap, massaging his knee with her two fingers. 

"Can't relate." Lance laughs hollowly. He really should've known better than to drink, especially from some weird alien alcohol that Coran of all people had collected. 

"I'm never drinking again," he says, thinking of a time when he kissed a girl he knew was in love with him. Lance may  play people a little, but he never hurts them intentionally. He'd been tipsy, and he'd been dancing with her for two songs when she'd pulled him into a closet and snogged him. She was the kind of girl that stared at you in class, smiling when you caught her. Lance had been picking up on hints for a year, which is why he tried so hard to apologize after that kiss. The girl, of course, had thrown her shoe in his face. 

"We all know that's not true," says Pidge. "Remember when you swore you would never touch alcohol again after you texted Professor McCoy, asking her out on a date?"

Lance groans. "Thanks for the reminder, Pidge." 

"You're welcome." Professor McCoy was one of the younger teachers at the Garrison, and Lance had a simple crush on her when he first joined. Things were awful in her class after that text. 

"I'm gonna go have breakfast," says Lance, pushing Pidge off of him. She snarls and punches his leg, to which Lance snickers. He sweeps through the door with a dramatic wave of his hand, and walks into the cold corridors. 

He pulls his jacket tighter around him. He doesn't get why this place has to be so cold. He's used to warm weather, tropical and desert. He supposes Altea must've been colder than Cuba. Besides, he isn't opposed to wearing his jacket. He's had it since he was five, when his father passed. It's always been too big for him, even now. 

He avoids taking the route that passes his room, because Keith's is next to his. He plans to avoid Keith as much as possible today, not sure if he can handle facing him now. Maybe going to the mess hall isn't the best idea, but at least he'll be able to hide behind Hunk. 

The mess hall is busy, with everyone save Pidge present. He avoids looking at Keith and walks to Allura. Her hair is ruffled and uncharacteristically messy, and there are bags under her eyes. She looks like a mess, though she didn't drink more than Lance yesterday. Shiro slides him a glass of water when he collapses in a chair, and he chugs it gratefully.

"I never knew alcohol could have such painful side effects," says Allura drowsily. Lance huffs and accepts a sandwich from Hunk.

"I hadn't expected it to be so strong, Allura," says Coran apologetically, holding his head in his hands. "I apologize."

"Mistakes were made," exclaims Pidge as she dramatically sweeps into the room. When Shiro glares at her she giggles manically.

"Jesus, Keith," says Hunk, rearing back when he leaned over Keith to grab a plate. "You stink. Why do you always wear the same jacket?"

"Why does Lance think with his _dick_ instead of his _brain_?" Keith snaps harshly. Pidge and Lance exchange a look - this is worse than they thought.

"Come on, Keith," Shiro says, a pleading look on his face as he puts down his sandwich. Lance focuses intently on his plate, feeling blood rush to his cheeks and his heart pump in his ears. Deadly silence fills the room and deafens them all.

"Whatever," Keith says before he pushes his plate away and storms off. Lance pretends he doesn't feel hurt and looks at Shiro, who looks at the door tiredly. Shiro catches his gaze and sighs.

"I tried to talk to him," he says. "He won't listen." Lance nods and pushes his plate away too, no longer feeling particularly hungry. 

"I think it's a good idea to lay low for a few days," says Allura suddenly, after a few minutes of awkward silence. "Everyone's obviously tired and I don't think this team can function when we're at each others necks like this." Lance wonders if this has anything to do with her hangover, but he drops the thought and stands up. "I'm going to get us to a nice place to rest," Allura says with a small smile.

Lance nods and walks with Allura to the bridge. He needs to distract himself for some time, and helping Allura with something might do just that. 

"What's going on with Keith?" Allura asks as she takes her place at the helm. She places her hands on the controls and the Castle's navigation system pops up. 

"He's angry at Shiro and me," says Lance sulkily. He doesn't want to mention he slept with Shiro, because he doesn't know how she would react.

"Because he found you becoming intimate?" Lance gapes at her in stunned silence. "What?"

"I just didn't... Do Altean societies accept-"

"It's normal for Alteans to have no sexual preferences. We do not have intercourse as casually as humans, but we understand bodily reactions to certain specimen." Lance is taken aback by how formal she makes it all sound, as if sex is a logical thing. 

"So you're all ace? Or are you pansexual?" Allura chuckles, keeping her gaze fixed on her screens. 

"In your terms, we are generally pansexual. There are, of course, a select few that love differently, but they're quite rare." Lance makes an amazed sound, relieved he doesn't have to hide this from Allura anymore. "I am aware that both you and Shiro are bisexual, though I have more difficult determining the preferences of the others." 

"I can help you with that," says Lance, proudly puffing out his chest. Allura laughs again, and Lance realizes he likes the sound. "Let's see... Pidge is ace, Hunk is pan and I'm pretty sure Keith is straight." Lance's smile fades from his face when he realizes what he's said is true. There have been several times where Keith gained the affection of girls, and he seems to be comfortable with it. Allura doesn't notice Lance's silence, focusing on her work.

"Ah," she says after a few moments. "What about this?" Lance looks at the window, and sees an island cluster not unlike the one he was stuck in with Keith, but bigger and greener. There's a few islands the size of the Castle with great fields of grass and poppies, the season in full bloom. Water sprays the coats in white drops, and the dark blue waters stretch and snake between the islands. 

"It's perfect," Lance says. It doesn't remind him of home, and it's colorful enough to keep Lance's mind from straying to that night in the cave. "Do you mind if I go explore with Blue?" 

"Not at all," Allura says, smiling down at him. They'd be the same height if Allura weren't standing on the platform. Lance nods gratefully and dashes off to the elevator. "Lance?" Allura calls just before he can close the doors. "We'll be on that island over there." She points to a large island to their right, and Lance nods. 

Not surprisingly he finds Keith with the dragons, cleaning Red's saddle with soap. He looks up and frowns when he sees Lance.

"What are you doing here?" he snaps, turning back to his leather saddle. Blue is wrestling in the corner with Red, and Reyna comes up to Lance to nuzzle him. 

"I'm just going to explore the islands," says Lance, keeping his voice as neutral as possible. He strokes Reyna's spikes head, and hisses when she sends little shocks over his arm. How Shiro can put up with the constant electricity that Reyna radiates, Lance will probably never know. He whistles and watches Blue reluctantly take her mouth from Red's neck. She trots to him and bumps her nose against his chest, earning a pat on the head. 

"Islands?" Keith asks, pausing his cleaning and looking at Lance questioningly. 

"Yeah. Allura's given us a few days off, and we're staying on a bunch of islands." Lance shrugs and walks to the saddle rack, choosing the large black saddle with blue embroidery. "I just wanna look around for an hour or so," he says while he lifts the saddle onto Blue's back with a grunt. He ducks under her stomach to grab the strap and fastens it to the other side, pulling it tight. He then reaches around her front and fastens another strap before tugging sharply at the saddle to test it. It doesn't move. 

"Oh," says Keith, seemingly bored. Lance sighs quietly, and turns to Keith. 

"Look, Keith," he says, his hands hanging limply by his sides. "I'm sorry you had to see it okay?" The words don't come out like he wants them to and he wonders if he could've phrased that differently. 

"Sure," says Keith. It might be Lance's imagination, but he thinks he sees a flash of hurt in Keith's eyes. Lance nods, mostly to himself and presses the comm on the wall. 

"Hey, Allura?" he says, holding his finger down on the screen. "Could you open the doors please?" He releases his finger, waiting for a bleep.

"Sure," chirps Allura from the other side. With that familiar great groan, light comes flooding into the hangar. Lance glances at Keith one last time before leaping into Blue. 

"Lance, wait." Lance reigns in Blue just before she takes off, and looks at Keith. He fidgets with the hem of his jacket, shuffling his feet uncertainly. "Could I come with you?" Lance blinks, surprised at the request. He attempts a cocky grin, not quite ready to reveal how happy Keith just made him. 

"Sure thing, cowboy," he says with a wink. Keith rolls his eyes but whistles at Red. He has her saddled within minutes, and as soon as he's seated, Lance spurs on Blue. She gives one powerful beat of her wings before shooting through the doors, climbing high and diving down, like they always do. 

The passages between the islands are even narrower here, and Blue doesn't fit between them. Red does, and she's no longer hindered by cargo, so Keith soars below them, twisting and turning. 

Show off.

Lance bends low over Blue's neck, and she speeds up, leaving stupid Keith behind. Soon they've cleared the cluster, gliding smoothly over open ocean. 

"Oh no," Lance gasps when he sees glimmering below the surface. He prays Blue hasn't seen it, but Lance can feel her excitement as soon as she spots the fish. "No! Blue, please!" His shouts are futile, and Blue dives down into the water. Surprisingly warm water engulfs him, cutting off his air and blinding him. His jacket drags through the water as he clings onto Blue. She jerks and lashes at the fish, huge silvery things swimming all around them. As soon as she's got about five, she unfurls her secondary wings and  swims up. Lance gasps for air when they break the surface,  breaking free from and glaring at a happy Blue. She stares back, feigning innocence  with a tilt of her head. She knows exactly what she's done.

Lance looks up when he hears Keith laugh, clutching his sides and nearly toppling off Red. He's never seen Keith laugh so much, tears in his eyes and gasping for breath. Lance grumbles and swims to Blue's back again. She beats her wings, struggling for a second before she lifts off into the air, fish still flapping in her mouth. 

They fly to the nearest island, where Lance quickly hops off Blue and takes off his jacket. He squeezes it, and water flows from his hands. He sighs and drops it to the floor, glaring at Blue, who's munching happily on her fish. Keith's still laughing when he lands next to him, wiping tears from his eyes.

"Hey," Lance says with a shrug, "at least she didn't light herself on fire with me on her." Keith abruptly stops laughing, feigning offense. Lance is referring to a time when Red had set fire to herself when Keith wasn't wearing his armor, effectively singeing his hair and causing him to jump off in panic. Luckily Shiro had caught him, but Lance doesn't ever let it slide.  

"Yeah, but I'm not the one soaked through," says Keith, his smile returning. "She's just as impulsive as you."

"I am not impulsive! I am the most strategic person of this team?"

"Then why do we have a cow called Kaltenecker in the stables?" Lance opens his mouth to speak but he can't think of anything valid to say. 

Lance glares at him but looks out at the cliff they'd landed on. He walks to the edge and looks down. The cliff is an overhang and the sea is calm beneath him. Lance looks at Blue, who comes to stand beside him. 

"Think it's safe?" he asks her quietly.  She purrs and Lance smiles. He walks back to where he left his jacket and pulls his shirt over his head, stripping down to his boxers. When he looks at Keith, he's staring. "Watch this, mullet."

Then he runs at the cliff. Keith yelps but it's too late. He spreads his arms out and dives forward, plunging into the deep blue in perfect form. He hits the water and slips under the surface with effortless ease, followed by Blue. 

He swims to the surface, and sees Keith staring at him from the top of the cliff. 

"That's a fifteen foot drop!" Keith says in amazement. Lance grins.

"Try it!" Keith hesitates, and Lance scoffs. "You're not scared, are you?" That does the trick. Keith flips him off and walks away from the cliff, charging back a minute later bare chested and falling forward. His dive isn't as beautiful as Lance imagines his was, but he smiles at Keith when he surfaces anyway. 

"Pretty good for a fire boy, huh?" Keith raises his eyebrow haughtily. Lance has never seen Keith act so cocky, and he feels himself go red in the face. He turns and swims towards Blue, who's floating on her back. 

"Come on, girl," he calls, and Blue flips onto her stomach. Lance climbs on, and holds out his hand to help Keith. To his surprise he takes it, and Lance nearly topples off. "You might wanna hold on," he says after he swallowed thickly. His heart thumps loudly when he feels Keith wrap his arms around his waist completely. 

When did he get this gooey?

Blue must've felt what he was thinking, because she puts in extra effort to burst from the water dramatically. She shoots straight up, making Keith cling to Lance tightly. She certainly knows how to make Lance blush. 

Red comes bounding toward them when they land on the cliff, laughing and shaking water from their hair. She nuzzles Blue affectionately, something Lance has never seen her do. Maybe it's because Blue is projecting Lance's emotions. 

Lance turns to look at Keith, and feels his heart skip a beat. He's seen Keith shirtless before, of course, but that was a long time ago. He'd been a skinny, frail boy, hunched over and bony.

He's still not exactly buff, but his torso is sculpted and toned. He stand straight and proud, with the body that's somewhat like a model's. Lance inhales quietly, blood rushing straight to his face. 

"Uhh... we-" he sputters stupidly. He can't seem to form a coherent thought, and he has to look away to avoid making an absolute fool of himself. "Do you want to go again?" he manages. 

Keith's red too, and he nods. Lance smiles, hoping he doesn't look too flustered and walks to the cliff. He remembers to take off Blue's saddle, because it's hindering in the water. 

"On three?" says Keith, raising an eyebrow at Lance. Lance can only nod. "One. Two. Three!"

* * *

They arrive back at the Castle several hours later, laughing and soaking wet. Lance has put his pants back on but left his shirt and jacket off, holding them under his arm instead. Keith's shirt is clinging to his chest, defining every line. They unsaddle their dragons and walk to the mess hall, trailing water and mud. 

Shiro and Pidge both raise an eyebrow when they stumble in, and Hunk grins. Coran orders to them change immediately, seething because he's just cleaned the _quiznacking floor._ Lancewinks at him before running to his room.

Once he's there he immediately strips and steps into the shower, letting the hot water cascade down his body. He runs a hand through his hair, thinking about today. Keith'd been so mad at him today, why would he change his mind so easily? 

There were moments where Lance caught Keith smiling sadly or staring at his chest, but Lance never figured out why. Now, standing here, under the hot stream, it feels like he takes his first full breath. He steadies himself against the wall and slowly slides to the floor. Be still my young heart. His chest feels full of air and his limbs are made of concrete. He feels like singing and crying at the same time, but he turns off the shower instead. 

He swiftly dries off and tugs on clean sweatpants and a green shirt, before flopping onto his bed. He squeals and presses his pillow over his head, trashing and kicking. He grabs his phone and turns up the volume and selects a song that reminds him of home. He taps to the beat, nodding his head and shakes his shoulder.

He jumps up and dances, jumping up and swinging his hips. He laughs, purely to himself and out of unadulterated excitement. He's going to tell Keith, tonight.

A knock sounds on his door and Lance turns down the music before he opens the door. It's Pidge, a sober expression haunting her face. Lance steps aside solemnly, and Pidge lifts her head. Once he closes the door she jumps up and squeals and screeches, joined by Lance. 

"Tell me everything!" she demands, shaking Lance's shoulders. Lance tells her about their conversation in the hangar, how Keith had acted so hurt. He talks about Blue making Keith laugh, and jumping off the cliff together. When he tells her about Red cuddling up to Blue, Pidge gasps and slaps his arm. "Red! Is! Projecting! Keith! Dammit!" Each word is a hit on Lance's arm, and it's red when she stops. 

"Ow! Stop it!" He pushes her away. "I think I'm gonna tell him," he says, suddenly worried. He's not going to change his mind, but what if Keith just felt happy? What if Lance is looking into this all wrong and he misjudged the signs? 

"Yes, you have to," says Pidge resolutely. She stands up and holds out her hand. "Walk with me, my young padawan. Going to eat, we are."

"This isn't Star Wars and you're not Yoda," sighs Lance, rolling his eyes. Pidge looks affronted and insulted, before she throws her head back and laughs. Lance takes her hand and they walk back to the mess hall together. 

Keith, Shiro, Allura, Hunk and Coran are waiting for them there, a steaming pot of pasta and red sauce on the middle of the table, and plates neatly arranged at every chair. Lance doesn't look at Keith when he sits at his seat next to him, but smiles down at his plate. 

"So what did you guys do today?" asks Pidge with a smirk. Lance glares at her.

"I beat Keith in a swimming race," he says, looking at Shiro and Allura. Shiro looks confused, looking from Keith to Lance and back again.

"It really wasn't a fair fight," grumbles Keith, but he's smiling too. 

"It never is," says Lance, feigning exasperation and rolling his eyes. Keith sticks out his tongue at him and Lance blushes. 

"What the quiznack?" says Shiro quietly, frowning at the two of them. Lance and Keith burst out laughing at the same time, and Lance winks at Shiro.

"Apparently Keith needs to be absolutely humiliated for him to be nice to someone."

"Hey! That is _not_ true!" says Keith indignantly. Pidge and Hunk laugh along with them, while Allura still doesn't seem to be over her hangover. She bites her lip and stares at her plate but glances at them from time to time.

Pidge suddenly gives a loud hiccup, and Hunk softly hits the back of her head. "I told you not to eat your food so quickly."

"Yes, mother," says Pidge mockingly, and Hunk grins.

"Does that mean I'm married to Shiro?" he asks with a mischievous smile, winking at Shiro.

"For the last time," says Shiro, giving a great sigh. "I'm not your adoptive father."

"That would certainly be awkward," says Allura quietly. Lance huffs a sigh and stares back at his plate, running a hand through his hair. He can feel Pidge's gaze burning into him, but he doesn't look up until Hunk speaks. 

"Okay, so Lance is the mother - ow! Why'd you do that?" he says when Pidge prods him with her elbow, glancing nervously at Keith's red face. Lance doesn't blame Hunk for being oblivious, but that doesn't stop the burning embarrassment.

"Shiro!" says Coran, attempting to break the awkward silence that ensues. Lance doesn't see Shiro as a brother or a father like the others do, but as a friend. Shiro's helped all the others through their rough spots, but he's never really needed help. Where Shiro takes care of the team, Lance takes care of himself. "Would you help me with a particularly heavy artifact that needs to be placed somewhere else on this ship?" Lance doubts there actually is something Shiro needs to carry, but he appreciates the interference. 

"Keith," says Allura, standing up and pushing her chair back. "I need your help with some Galra equipment I acquired some time ago. It's on the bridge."

Lance can _feel_ Keith's face fall at the mention of the Galra tech, and he feels tempted to shout at Allura for saying something like that. He stays seated, however, knowing how important this could be. Keith and Shiro are the only ones who can access Galra equipment, and they're often asked to do this sort of stuff. 

"Yeah," he says quietly, dragging his feet as he walks after her to the bridge. As soon as they're out of the room Pidge punches Hunk.

"Ow!" Hunk exclaims, pouting as he rubs his arm. "Why'd you do that?"

"Lance is tryna tell Keith he likes him! And you just messed up their happiness!" Pidge seethes, glaring up at Hunk.

"Oh. OH!" Hunk's eyes turn comically large and his mouth makes a perfect 'O'. "Why didn't you tell me? Oh this is amazing!" Hunk excitedly clasps his hands together, and Lance laughs.

"Yeah," says Pidge, smiling smugly, "and you gotta pay up."

"Wait, you bet on this?" Lance says, gaping at Pidge in disbelief. Pidge nods proudly as Hunk hands her twenty American dollars with a frown. 

"He bet Keith would be the first to admit it," she says. Lance wonders why they never told him, but then he realizes that was part of the joke. He huffs and leans back in his chair. 

"Lance, you need to talk to him," says Hunk. 

"Pidge says I need to wait two days," Lance says, lounging with his hands behind his back. 

"That was before you two jumped off a cliff together," says Pidge with a roll of her eyes. "Now you gotta fuck, obviously."

"Pidge!" says Hunk, shocked. Lance laughs as he's reminded that Hunk is three years older than Pidge but tenfold more innocent. It's something he always appreciated about Hunk, the purity of him. "You can't just do that to someone you really like. You have to take them out to a nice dinner first, and tell them you like the way they smile or something cute like that." 

Lance feels color rise to his cheeks and he chuckles nervously. He liked Keith's smile when it was genuine, but any other time it was the most annoying thing ever. Lance is surprised he still hates so many things about Keith, but that he likes it all anyway. His stupid haircut that stopped being acceptable over a hundred years ago, and his outrageously minimal ability to have fun. He doesn't understand basic jokes, but he does that head-tilt that makes him look like a puppy. Lance doesn't understand why he's thinking about all this suddenly. 

"I think I'll just start by telling him about my feelings?" says Lance uncertainly, not exactly knowing how to deal with this. He may flirt and fuck around with plenty of people, but he has no experience with emotions like these. 

"That sounds better," say Pidge and Hunk at the same time. Lance stands up and takes a deep breath, puffing out his cheeks when he exhales. He squares his shoulders and raises his chin, rolling his eyes at the thumbs-up from Pidge.

"Okay. I can do this," he mutters under his breath. His heart thumps in his throat and he thinks he's going to throw up, but he walks briskly towards the bridge. 

When he approaches, he hears Allura and Keith talking quietly. He doesn't mean to eavesdrop, but he's never heard Allura talk so gently. When he hears Keith he stops right by the entrance, unable to contain himself. He risks a look, seeing Allura standing close to Keith by the helm, not a piece of Galra tech in sight. Keith has his back to Lance, and Allura has a hand wrapped around his wrist.

"You can trust me, you know that," says Allura, staring intently at Keith's face.

"Yeah," replies Keith, barely audible and gazed locked onto the floor.

"I don't care that you're Galra, Keith," Allura whispers before she gently presses her lips to Keith's. For a second Lance thinks he's going to push her away, but then he throws her arms around her and kisses her back. 

Lance feels the air leave his body, tears filling his eyes against his will. He makes a strangled noise, standing openly in the doorway. Keith jerks away from Allura and swivels around, eyes going wide when he sees Lance. He starts forward, reaching his hand towards Lance, but he's already gone.

 Lance is running, gasps racking his body as he dives into the dragon hangar. He doesn't even bother saddling Blue. He slams the emergency release button to open the hangar doors and leaps onto Blue, lettting her soar into the clouds.  
Only when they're gliding in the clear, starry night do sobs tear from Lance's stomach, breaking the terrible silence that surrounds him. 

Blue makes an unhappy sound beneath him, and descends onto a grass field, landing smoothly and lowering herself into the ground. Lance slides off, gasping for air that just won't seem to fill his lungs and sobbing as the hole in his chest expands with every minute. Blue curls around him, letting him hide in her embrace.

"I-I was so s-stupid!" he rasps, punching feebly into her side. The temperature around him seems to drop ten degrees and the stars dull in the dark sky. Hours spent hating Keith because it was easier to accept the truth fade in the wind. Late nights laying awake wondering why he doesn't feel anything for anyone at the Garrison wasted. Everything had started to make sense. He's wanted Keith from the very start. A touch-starved and homesick boy alone in this world, following a light that has diminished within seconds. "I want to go home," he says. "Please, I just want to go home."

He hears a loud screech then, and he looks up to see Rex soaring towards him. Pidge leaps off before Rex has even touched down, running at Lance and throwing her arms around him. Lance hiccups and cries into her shoulder, shoulders shaking and chest burning. He hears Pidge sniffle, and he holds her tighter.

Keith likes Allura enough to kiss her. And Lance hates Keith enough to never want to speak to him again.

Except he doesn't. 

He shakes in Pidge's arms as his heart stabs his insides with every beat. His face feels raw and his limbs are too heavy to hold. He hates this, himself and that stupid bastard. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was rlly hard to write for some reason. Hope you fine people enjoyed ❤️


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is gonna be so angsty. *whispers* I hope I die cause Voltron is giving me feels.

Keith forgave Shiro as soon as he apologized that morning. He couldn't blame him after all. Shiro is human and he hasn't had contact like that since Kerberos. 

He forgave Lance when he plummeted into the water with Blue, and he'd made Keith laugh harder than ever. 

He hasn't forgiven himself for falling for Lance, of all people. He hasn't forgiven himself for being jealous and spiteful. He hadn't meant what he said in the mess hall.

It still hurt when he found out Shiro and Lance were a thing. Hunk confirmed it when he called Lance a mother after calling Shiro the father. Lance had blushed and avoided his gaze, and now he barely contained his tears as he walks with Allura to the bridge.

He just wants to like a girl for a change. Things would be far easier if he were _normal_. 

"Allura? Where's the tech you want me to unlock?" he asks, looking for anything of Galra origin on the deck. There isn't anything, just a rubble of scrap parts next to Pidge's seat. 

"I wanted to talk to you, Keith," she says, turning to him and batting her eyelashes. Keith does think she's pretty, but that's all he thinks of it. He doesn't feel the urge to kiss her or he doesn't wonder what her skin feels like against his own like he does with boys. 

"Uhh... okay," he says uncertainly, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck. "What d'you wanna talk about?" He has a bad feeling about this, but he wants to see where this leads.

"You know I had... trouble when I found out you were part Galra," she says, her cheeks turning red. She looks nervous as well, though Keith isn't sure why. "I was angry at myself for trusting you and calling you my friend." Keith isn't sure he likes where this conversation is going, and he shifts uncomfortably on his feet. "Then you saved me and I realized the reason I was so angry was because I trusted you so much more than the others." 

There it is. Keith makes to move back, but Allura catches his wrist, holding him in place. They're quiet for a long moment, Allura's thumb rubbing circles on the soft skin of his wrist, while Keith figures out what to do next. 

"Allura, I don't think this is a good idea," he says shyly. Allura looks at him and smiles softly, perhaps reading his nervous fidgeting as a sign of flusteredness and not unease. 

"Why not?" she says, biting her lip playfully. "You know you can trust me."

Unable to think of anything to say with Allura so close to him, he shrugs slightly. "Yeah..." he offers lamely. 

"I don't care that you're Galra, Keith," she whispers then, and presses her lips to Keith's. Time seems to slow down and Keith stares at Allura in shock. Maybe if he kisses back he'll feel something. What if the only reason he's never felt anything for a girl is because he's never kissed one? 

He decides to try it and wraps his arms awkwardly around Allura's taller body. He snaps away, however, when he hears a strange sound behind him, like someone choking on air. He turns on his heel and sees Lance, standing in the doorway and eyes wide in shock, filling rapidly with tears. Shit. 

He starts towards him and Lance dashes away, his gasps echoing through the halls.

"Oh fuck," he whispers. He turns and looks at Allura apologetically. "I'm sorry, Allura. I have to-" she nods sadly and Keith runs out after Lance. 

The alarm blares in his ears when he rounds the corner to the dragon corner, and he barges in just in time to see Blue's tale disappear into the sky. He moves towards Red but is showed aside hard, and he stumbles and lands on his ass.

"You've done enough!" Pidge towers over him, eyes wild. She whistles at Rex and flies after Lance, leaving a searing hole in Keith's chest. He doesn't chase after them, because he knows he'll just make things worse. Tears sting his eyes and he runs into the corridors, not going in any particular direction.

He tears into the hall leading to his room and crashes into something tall, and finds Shiro holding him steady, face drawn with panicked worry.

"What's going on?" Shiro demands. "Is anyone hurt?" Keith shakes his head and opens his mouth to speak, but only a strangled croak comes out. Shiro squeezes his shoulder and searches in his eyes, presumably looking for any signs of pain. His gaze softens when tears promptly flow from Keith's eyes, and he tugs him into a hug when Keith starts to sob in earnest. He feels torn apart and stitched together again, bleeding from cracks in his skin and fighting a war he can't win. He's never lost it like this, clutching onto Shiro's shirt, punching into his chest and biting the inside of his cheek until it bleeds. Only an incompetent idiot could have this kind of irrefutable effect on him, could ruin him so completely.

Shiro doesn't ask why he's a blubbering mess, why his shirt is wet with Keith's tears. He knows. Keith can tell by the way he strokes Keith's back, like he's letting him fall apart. Because Shiro can't fix this, only Keith can.

"I'm so fucking stupid," he sighs into Shiro's chest. Shiro huffs, and Keith can feel his breath on his scalp. 

"No argument there," he says calmly. "So what are you gonna do about it?" Trust Shiro to get him off his ass and think. 

Keith pulls away and tries his face with the back of his hand. He looks at Shiro and nods. "I'm gonna get us out of this crap."

He sees Shiro's smile when he walks past Shiro to his room, locking the door behind him. He plans to wait here, wait for Lance to calm down and return to the Castle. He's going to let Pidge do whatever she needs to do, as long as she doesn't have a knife, and then he's going to tell Lance the truth. Finally, he's going to kiss Lance until he forgets he ever fucked Shiro. He paces his room, wrapping a hand in his hair and kicking clothes from his path. This room was obviously meant to be a dorm, he suddenly thinks, looking at the bed stacked on top of his own. He never really noticed it. He supposes this ship was supposed to be manned by a larger crew. 

What makes Lance so special? He's not particularly gifted at anything other than shooting and flirting. Keith's not afraid to admit that Lance is incredibly beautiful, but it still doesn't seem enough to give Lance so much power over Keith. He's completely at Lance's mercy now - his life in the hands of an arrogant fool. Keith wants to hit himself over the head with a baseball bat. 

He sits on his bed and puts his head in his hands. He taps his foot impatiently before changing his mind and clambering into the empty top bunk, where he lies facedown. 

He stays there for at least two hours, tossing and turning restlessly. The alarm stops blaring at some point, and silence fills the room. Keith preferred it when he couldn't hear himself think. He knows how Lance feels about him - he's made that clear a select few times, yet Keith is still fidgeting nervously at the thought of confessing. 

Suddenly there's a knock on his door, and Keith slams his head against the ceiling when he sits up too quickly. Groaning, he stumbles to the door and finds Pidge there, understandably with murder in her eyes and her hands curled into fists by her side. Keith prepares himself for the punch, but he still doubles over when he's hit in the gut. Pidge is known for sneaky attacks like these, to areas not well protected. 

She stomps inside and pushes Keith over, making him land hard on his back. 

"What the _fuck_ , Keith?!" she bellows, spit flying and her hand drawing back for another punch. Keith catches her hand and ducks away, scrambling to his feet. Maybe he isn't so ready to take a beating as he thought. 

"I know!" he says through gritted teeth. "I didn't mean to kiss her back. I just thought it would be so much easier if I weren't so fucking gay!" He hadn't meant to add in that last part, but it works, because Pidge stares at him in stunned silence. Then she punches him again. 

"Of course everything would be easier if you were straight!" she yells. "But that doesn't give you the right to play _two_ people like that." Oh shit. Right. Allura had feelings for him, too. Keith bites his lip, feeling guilty he hadn't thought about that.

"I didn't mean to," he croaks miserably. "I thought Lance was with Shiro." Pidge's face softens and she steps away from Keith, holding out a hand. Keith shakes it, his eyes watering when pain flares up on his stomach. There's going to be a bruise.

"Sorry," says Pidge bluntly, suggesting that she isn't truly sorry. "Keith, you really hurt Lance. He was so happy after the cliff, and now... well you should see him." 

Keith makes an unhappy sound and sits on the floor. Pidge joins him and crosses her legs, making her seem like a child. 

"How bad is it?" He's almost afraid to ask, but he needs to know just how much damage he did. 

"He's been talking about his home for an hour," Pidge says, shaking her head solemnly. Keith knows that it takes quite a bit to get Lance to even mention his home, and he takes a deep breath as he rubs the back of his neck. "He's stopped bawling, but I don't know if that's a good thing or not." 

Keith rests his head in his hands as he feels tears threaten to spill over again, taking another deep breath to calm himself. Pidge takes his wrist but doesn't pull it away, squeezing softly. Keith shakes his head and cries out softly. 

"I'm sorry, Pidge," he manages. "I never meant to-" His voice cuts off there, but the tears don't spill. 

"I know you didn't, but he's a mess. Don't give him time." Keith looks up in confusion.

"Why not?" Time to think always cleared Keith's head. Pidge smiles softly and shakes her head.

"Lance'll think too much," she chuckles hollowly. "He'll find a way to blame himself eventually, if he hasn't already." 

Keith looks down at his shoes and sighs deeply. This is all his fault. If he hadn't gotten so jealous over the aspect of Shiro and Lance, this wouldn't have happened. He stands and squares his shoulders.

"Thank you, Pidge," he says, ruffling her hair. 

"I didn't do this for you. He was being too damn emotional, and it's exhausting." Keith laughs, but sobers up again, nerves crackling in his system.

"Where is he?" his voice feels small even to his own ears. 

"Pool." 

Keith nods and strides through the door, purposefull in his steps and gaze fixed forward. He feels like a soldier going into battle. He might not make it back alive, but Keith feels like he's been killed anyway. 

He feels like an idiot when he stands in front of the elevator, hesitating with his finger hovering in front of the button. He figures he is. Fools have nothing to lose, he thinks before pressing his finger onto the screen. The elevator arrives with a soft ding and Keith steps inside, nervously tapping his foot against the floor while he waits.

The doors open and Keith is hit with the smell of artificial salt and the scent only pools seem to be able to obtain. He sees Lance swimming in the middle lane, smoothly running one hand in front of another and gliding through the water.

"Lance." The name slips from Keith's lips before he can stop it, and Lance jerks up from the water. His eyes are red and puffy, his lower lip still quivering.

"What do you want, Keith?" he says quietly, so that Keith barely hears it.

"Lance, I'm so sorry. I never meant to kiss her," Keith pleads. He's so _desperate_.

"Go fuck yourself." Lance sounds so defeated, so small, but Keith can hear he means it.

"Lance, please." Keith wades into the water, not caring for his clothes. When he's waist deep he comes to a halt, standing a few feet from Lance. "What do I have to say?"

"Nothing," whispers Lance, voice trembling. "I don't want to hear it." Lance turns his back to Keith, crossing his arms. Keith clenches his fists and feels heat rise to his cheeks.

"That's not fair!" he shouts at Lance, making him still. "How do you think I felt when I saw you with Shiro?!"

Lance turns, his brow pinched together and his teeth bared. "That was before there was even the slightest chance of anything happening! You led me on! I thought I stood a chance with you, and you fucking stabbed me in the back! Why with Allura, of all people?" Keith feels a pang in his chest at Lance's words, because they're true.

"Because she was _there_! She was there and I was scared!" A sob tears from him as he admits it. "I let her kiss me because I thought you were with Shiro," he says defeatedly, voice cracking as he stares at his feet.

"I'm not!" Lance says, less forcefully and walking back to Keith. Keith's throat burns and his hands fall limp to his sides. "I'm not," Lance repeats, voice soft and shaky.

"I know," gasps Keith, stumbling forward into Lance's chest. He wraps his arms around Lance's waist and holds tight, afraid to let go. He buries his face into his neck and lets loose a breath when Lance finally responds. Lance chuckles weakly - Keith can feel his chest vibrate against his own.

When Lance pulls away Keith wants to cling onto him and force him to stay. He doesn't expect Lance to grab his waist and press his lips against Keith's. His other hand softly presses against Keith's cheek, holding him steadily in place. Keith grabs onto Lance's hips again, opening his mouth to breathe when Lance steps closer. He doesn't know how to do this, and he pulls away when he feels Lance's tongue flick across his lips, his heart racing too fast to continue.

Lance looks at him worriedly, dropping his hands and stepping back. "Shit. I'm sorry, Keith. I-I didn't... didn't-" Lance rambles, color rising to his tan cheeks.

"No!" says Keith quickly. "No, it's not that." He hesitates, wondering if he's completely ruined the moment. "I just... don't want to rush." Tension leaves Lance's shoulders and he lets out a breath.

"Yeesh, you scared me, kiddo," Lance says with a shy grin. Keith rolls his eyes and shoves him against the chest.

"I just walked right into a pool with my clothes to admit my feelings for you - don't you dare call me 'kiddo'" Keith says, though the smile on his face is starting to hurt. Lance laughs and wiggles his eyebrows.

"I didn't hear a confession," he says innocently. Keith groans and pushes him again, this time sending him toppling under water. When Lance comes up he's shaking with laughter, and he surges forward to tackle Keith, plunging them both into the shallow end. Keith accidentally inhales, and he splutters and coughs to get the water out of his system, but it doesn't work because he can't get out from underneath Lance. Instinctual terror stiffens his limbs and soon he finds himself being dragged up and carried to the edge.

"Oh fuck, Keith, I'm so sorry," rambles Lance frantically, rubbing Keith's back as he hacks up his lungs. Keith struggles a laugh through his fit, and leans back against Lance's shoulder.

"Let's not do that again," he heaves, and Lance chuckles in response.

"Agreed. Come on," he says, helping Keith to his feet. "You gotta change and I gotta eat."

"We had dinner two hours ago, Lance," says Keith, raising an eyebrow.

"So?" Lance says as they walk to the elevator, dripping water everywhere and not particularly caring about anything at all. "I'm hungry."

Their shoulder touch when they're in the elevator, and Keith feels flushed all over. He glances at Lance, hoping he doesn't notice, but he sees Lance seems just as flustered. When the doors open he struggles with moving in the opposite direction as Lance. Apparently his forehead is at the level of Lance's lips, because just before they part Lance doesn't even seem to raise his head a little when he kisses him.

Keith feels like punching him for making him seem so small, but he practically skips to his room.

\------

He finds Pidge and Lance talking excitedly in the common room, heads close together as they giggle and whisper. Hunk stands behind them, leaning over the couch to listen. Shiro sits on the other side of the sofa, kicked back and reading some novel with his dorky glasses. Allura is nowhere to be found, but Keith can't blame her. Coran is, for some reason, lying on his back on the floor.

Hunk gasps as soon as he spots Keith and tackles him in a bear hug, crushing his arms to his ribs.

"I'm so excited for you!" Hunk bellows like they've just announced their engagement or something.

"Hunk... can't breathe," Keith struggles to say. Hunk lets him go immediately, mumbling embarrassedly and brushing off Keith's shoulders.

Lance smiles at him, mouth full of bread and turned partially to listen to Pidge. It's disgusting, but Keith finds he doesn't really mind. He winks back and jumps over the couch, landing next to Shiro.

Shiro raises an eyebrow at his smile, grinning smugly. "You fixed it?"

"I fixed it," says Keith happily. Shiro makes a proud sound at the back of his throat and wraps his arm around Keith's neck, rubbing his knuckles on the top of his head. "Stop!" Keith shouts, laughing as he pushes away from Shiro.

"Shiro! Stop abusing the happy Keith!" Pidge shouts from across the couch.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Keith yells back, louder than necessary. Pidge shrugs innocently.

"You're always so emo, so I think we should enjoy this happy you when it lasts." Keith almost flips her off, remembers he's sitting next to Shiro, and thinks better of it. He doesn't particularly like the chances of him getting beaten to death if he does anything meant to offend Pidge.

"Don't talk to my precious baby like that!" yells Hunk indignantly from the kitchen. "Don't worry, my son-" he says, turning to Keith, "-your father and I will take care of you." Pidge, Keith and Lance start laughing hysterically at the sight of Shiro's face when he realizes he's been called a father again. Shiro grumbles on the couch for a minute, but then cracks a smile when he sees the three of them clutching their sides and rolling on the floor.

Lance and Keith sit next to each other when they've caught their breath, feet propped up on Coran's stomach and leaning back. Pidge has her head on Shiro's lap, her hair being played with absentmindedly. Hunk has joined Coran on the floor, curled around a bowl of chips. Without thinking Keith rests his head on Lance's shoulder, and finds himself being pulled down on top of him. It's like that night in the cave - legs tangled together and Keith's head on Lance's chest.

"Ah," Lance sighs. "See, I do remember this particular bonding moment."

"What!?" Keith rears back, staring at Lance in shock. Lance chuckles and tugs at Keith's hair, which is falling over his eyes. "What do you mean this particular one?" He hears Shiro snicker behind him. "You remember an accident but you don't remember a purposeful connection?" Lance grins cheekily, wrapping a finger around a dark curl on Keith's head.

"I have selective memory," he says, shrugging.

"You're an asshole, that's what you are," says Keith, sitting up and pushing away from Lance. He means to kiss Lance on the cheek but finds he enjoys the mild distress on his face.

"Hey, I'm sorry! I was bleeding profusely from multiple wounds!" Lance says defensively. "What did I say to my beautiful brooding teammate?" Keith blushes at the comment, ignoring the gagging sounds coming from Pidge and Shiro. 

"You said we make a pretty good team," he replies quietly, staring at Lance's chest. He never admitted this part to Lance, because it was never true to him before now.

"And am I ever wrong?"

"Only ninety-five percent of the time," says Keith haughtily, flopping back onto Lance. 

"Wow, Keith. That hurts," says Lance, stroking Keith's hair. 

"You two are more bipolar than a fourteen year old girl," mumbles Pidge from Shiro's lap. Keith turns to her and snickers.

"Pidge, _you're_ a fourteen year old girl," says Lance. Shiro chuckles when Pidge dismisses his comment with the wave of her hand. Lance sits up, taking Keith with him. He takes his hand and leads him away from the others towards the door.

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" Shiro calls after them. Keith groans but then remembers that Shiro did have sex with Lance, so the remark would be invalid. "On second thought, " Shiro says when Pidge whispers something to him, "just be safe." Keith hides his face in his free hand, an emberassed blush creeping onto his face. Lance snickers and takes Keith away.

Keith looks up when he sees they're not going to the rooms, but to the dragon hanger.  "Where are we going?" he asks, his curiosity thrumming in his chest. 

"It's a surprise," Lance says before he whistles to Blue.  Keith sees she's sleeping around Red, but she comes running anyway. Lance lets go of Keith's hand and clambers smoothly onto Blue's unsaddled back, before helping Keith up as well. Keith wraps his arms around Lance's waist without hesitation, and braces himself for the leap Blue takes. 

He's still not used to her rhythm, but it's more bearable when they glide over the low clouds. When he's sure Blue is steady, Lance stands and turns, before sitting down facing Keith. Lance has his knees over Keith's, and he holds his hands on the point where thigh and hips meet. 

"Blue knows where to go," Lance whispers, face close to Keith's and breath ghosting over Keith's.  

"Good," says Keith, closing the distance between them and kissing him deeply,  however, ding himself steady by placing his hands on the spot behind Lance's ass. Lance takes control, grabbing his face and moving slowly. Keith lets him, because he knows Lance is better at this. A thrill runs down his back when Lance carefully pulls him closer, wrapping his legs around Keith's waist. He can feel Blue descending, but he doesn't open his eyes to look. He doesn't care. 

 He yelps when Blue suddenly touches down, and he nearly topples off the side. Lance laughs against his mouth and pulls away,  shuffling back and swinging his leg over Keith with surprising ease. He slides down and waits for Keith, who pets Blue's side for a second. Lance leads them to the middle of a grass, where he takes put his phone. He taps the screen a few time and turns up the volume before tossing it onto the grass next to them. 

Keith recognizes the song vaguely and he sighs. "Your taste is ancient," he says. Lance looks affronted, but then he laughs.

"Your music taste is just new," he huffs, nodding his head along to the beat.

"Lance,  this song is a hundred years old."

" _I'm a sorry sucker and this happens all the time,_ " Lance sings, shaking his shoulders ridiculously and grinning like an idiot. Keith shakes his head, wondering how he got stuck with such an idiot.

"No! Lance, stop!" he shouts as Lance grabs Keith's waist and starts dancing preposterously. Lance wiggles his eyebrows and dips Keith, earning a burst of giggles. 

" _Hey, sugar, show me all your love. All you're giving me is friction_ ," Lance murmurs softly, voice low and tempting. 

 When the song ends Keith is left with a sudden need and he crashes his lips onto Lance's.  Lance responds immediatly, wrapping his arms around Keith's waist, pressing their bodies together. Keith opens his mouth, wanting Lance. He pushes forward, sending them both tumbling into the soft bedding of the grass. He places his knees on besides Lance's hips, straddling him and pressing forward still. He wants all of Lance,  right now. 

But Lance pulls back, looking at Keith with a mixture of amazement and confusion. "I though you wanted to go slow," he says breathlessly when Keith places their foreheads together. 

"Hmm," Keith replies, losing himself again in Lance's arms. Lance smiles and kisses him, all hesitation vanishing when he feels of readily Keith responds, moaning when he flicks his tongue inside Keith's mouth. 

Lance's hand moves down to Keith's ass, and Keith slips his fingers under Lance's shirt. They're both moving frantically when Lance sits up, tugging Keith's shirt over his head. Keith returns the favor, and runs his fingers over Lance's broad, toned chest. Keith pushes his hips down, feeling Lance's growing erection against his own. Lance whines quietly and tugs at his belt, desperate the be free. Keith helps him, and undoes his own. 

 When Keith's straining dick is finally free he sighs into Lance's mouth,  but Lance doesn't let him rest for one second. He flips Keith onto his back and looms over him, trailing kisses over his stomach when he pulls his pants down completely. Lance shimmies out of his own clothes, cock springing up proudly against his belly and reaching for his jacket, which he lost somewhere along the way.

Keith raises an eyebrow when Lance pulls out a small bottle, nerves crackling over his burning body. "I'm good at reading people," says Lance with a shrug. Before Keith has time to figure out what the hell that means, Lance's lips attack his neck and he feels a slicked finger against his entrance. His breath hitches when Lance pushes a digit inside, and he clings onto Lance's strong arms. His muscles burn and clench around Lance's fingers when he carefully adds another one, reaching for and finding his prostate. Lance's fingers are long and feel so good inside him, scissoring him loose and open.

When he pulls them out Keith whines breathlessly at the empty feeling, but Lance silences him by licking his mouth and bumping against his hole.  "Lance," Keith breathes, desperate for friction, but Lance takes his time.  He slowly pushes in, groaning into Keith's neck. Keith clutches onto Lance's neck, unable to keep his gasps quiet.

Lance stills when he's all in,  filling Keith completely and letting him adjust. Keith feels so _full_ , and he feel like he's going to come just from this.  But then Lance moves, thrusting his hips forward and biting into Keith's shoulder, and it doesn't take long before he spills all over his belly.  "Ah! Shit, Lance!" Keith exclaims, breathing hard and head void of all thought.

Lance grunts and keeps going, fucking Keith senseless until he fills him with come. "Fuck. Keith, god." Lance's whines are the most beautiful thing Keith has ever heard. He's so lightheaded, coming down from a high he's never reached. Lance pulls out of him and collapses, crushing him under his weight. Keith doesn't mind, stroking Lance's hair blissfully. 

"I hate you," he says, when they've both calmed down and their hearts have stopped racing. "I hate your stupid laugh, and your dumb eyes. I fucking hate how incompetent you are. I hate how lame your jokes are. I fucking hate you." 

"I love you, too," mumbles Lance sleepily against his chest, knocking all the air from Keith's lungs. "I love everything about you, Keith." 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my upcoming fic "Killing the children". It's in Keith's POV entirely, and is somewhat of a personality swap. Zombie apocalypse AU


End file.
